Monday 6 February 2012

Interpersonal Conflict

'Oh my god I really cannot stand her any longer! She's not even consulting us and doing whatever she wants!'

'Calm down Betty. Just bear with it for our sake, and for the sake of the freshmen okay. We are already this close to ending our orientation and this is probably the last time you'll be working with her!'

'Argh I'm so going to explode!'

Hanging out in a cosy Utown hostel at 2am in the morning after a shower, some of the Orientation Group Leaders (OGLs) were recounting the incident that had happened earlier that day in Vivocity. Managing an Orientation Group (OG) of 16 freshmen and 12 OGLs was no easy task, as the leaders had learnt to compromise and deal with issues over the span of the orientation week.

There were a mutual division of tasks among the OGLs where some would be leading the freshmen in the completion of tasks while the others ensured their safety and well-being. However, one of the OGLs, Veronica, stood out among the rest due to her unorthodox way of carrying out tasks. Without informing the other OGLs of her intentions and asking for their opinions, Veronica would lead the freshmen with her preferred approach, usually catching the other OGLs by surprise and much to their anger and frustration. As the freshmens' well-being was of top priority back then, none of the OGLs had pursued the matter and tolerated her actions.

The tipping point finally came when the group had to travel out of campus to Vivocity for the 'Amazing Race'. As there were many tasks at hand to be completed, the orientation group was split into smaller teams to complete the missions within the stipulated time. The meeting point was agreed unanimously at the Kopitiam food court.

While most of the teams had gathered upon completion of their appointed tasks, Veronica's team was nowhere to be seen. Betty immediately phoned Veronica to enquire on her whereabouts.

'Hello Veronica, where are you? Everyone is here except your team. Is everything okay?'

'Come up to the monorail ticketing counter now. There are tourists waiting for us to take a group photo. Hurry quick!'

Furious at the commanding tone of her voice, the lack of courtesy to inform others of her intentions (yet again), and possibly the accumulation of anger over these days, Betty finally snapped. She lashed out her anger at the other OGLs who were just as confused about the twist in the sequence of events, but never really got to confront Veronica despite her rage.

The following days went by with Betty challenging Veronica's intentions in leading the orientation group, much to the confusion of many. Tension was high between them, yet none of them made the move to back down.

After the orientation was over, Betty and Veronica gradually drifted apart into their separate lives and did not communicate much even in OG outings.

If Betty and the other OGLs had voiced out their opinions in response to Veronica's actions at the start of the orientation, such sour feelings may have been avoided. But then again, who knows?

10 comments:

  1. "If Betty and the other OGLs had voiced out their opinions in response to Veronica's actions at the start of the orientation, such sour feelings may have been avoided. "


    You meant 'at the end of the orientation' do you? The statement doesn't make sense the way you wrote it. How could Betty and the other OGLs know what Veronica would do before she'd even done it! By in any case fine style and story here, absolutely enjoyed it.


    For the solutions, I think this is merely a matter of expectations of the orientation, not so much a matter of miscommunication. After all, didn't everyone agreed the meeting point would be the 'kopitiam', but the expectations and boundaries of the orientations weren't as clear.

    Being an amazing race, yes, teams go out and hunt down their prize at the various stations, but nobody mentioned, or at least there was no rule forbidding anybody from perhaps having tea in the midst of the game, or talking with a group of strangers while happening to be going to the next game station, or checking out the pricey handbag or phone on display on outside shop entrances. The participants could literally do anything and still be in the game at the end of the game.

    The only matter might be Veronica exceeded the time limit and made everybody waited, that is the only issue I suppose, an issue worthy of communication, which is what your module ES2007s is all about I suppose. But the fact that Veronica took her team to the rail station isn't an issue of communication, just one for the expectations surrounding the mood and feel of the game. Unless of course you deem that Veronica should have communication her expectations of the mood and feel of the game beforehand, then that would be an issue under communication.


    Great work nonetheless Pam.

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    1. hello caster!

      I guess I wasn't too clear about certain points when I recounted the story which resulted in much inconsistencies in the storyline! Prior to this orientation, the OGLs actually had a preparatory camp in which we had to familiarise ourselves with games and get to know our fellow OGLs within the same group. Veronica had already been a topic of discussion back then but I guess the OGLs did not expect tensions and emotions to run high during the orientation camp itself.

      I do agree that some form of relaxation and enjoyment are part and parcel in amazing race and our teams did take time off to mingle around and just have fun. What I felt was frustrating and inappropriate was Veronica's lack of courtesy in informing us of her intentions. As we were in a public place and moving around in a large group, we are responsible for everyone's safety and felt that communication is extremely vital in the relaying of information to complete tasks together as a team. Such selfish last-minute information was uncalled for, as we could have changed our meeting location if Veronica had informed us earlier instead of leaving us in the lurch.

      Thanks so much for your comment and hopefully I was able to clear your doubts about my post? Do pardon my tone - interpersonal conflicts really cut feelings deep in.

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  2. Hi Pamela!

    Hm, I believe that such situations are common during orientation since there are so many issues involved and everybody is stressed up. And it would even be made worse if the OGLs do not n=know each other. So therefore, I propose to have an OGL camp before the orientation so that the OGLs would find out more about each other. At the same time, they could be taught relevant skills such as team work.

    Yah, I believed that if Betty and the OGLs have raised their issues before the start of orientation, then things would most likely not turn awkward. This is because Veronica would be aware of how her fellow OGLs feel, and she would most likely to be sensitive. Well, if raising the issue to her doesn't change her attitude, then it might be better if Betty speaks to the overall in-charge so that they can make rearrangement to the allocation of duties to achieve the optimum result.

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    1. hello gladys!

      Yes I do agree that an OGL camp is definitely essential to help us get to know our fellow OGLs better and work together as a team! I guess we should have addressed the issue early before our frustration gets accumulated due to differences in opinion and our inability to voice things out.

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  3. Hi Pamela!

    I feel that Veronica should learn to work in a team. It is really irresponsible of her to not follow the agenda and account for her actions despite being a group leader. Maybe it could have helped if a senior member or someone of a higher authority stepped in and advised her about it. Like Gladys mentioned, she might not be aware of her fellow OGL's feelings to her actions.

    By voicing out their opinions at the start of the orientation, they could have understood and try to accommodate one another too. And since it is still at an early stage, if Veronica was too stubborn to compromise, she could have been allocated to a different responsibility instead of bringing the freshmen around. She could also have been assigned a partner to keep her actions in check.=)

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    1. Hey Eileen!

      Hmm that's true! I guess the crux of the problem is the OGL's inability to voice out the problem and allow it to snowball into an emotional conflict. I doubt Veronica will be allocated another responsibility but at least she will be more sensitive to others when working as a team. :)

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  4. Hi Pamela, your question is really interesting! Who knows? You, Veronica and the rest of the OGLs would have known haha! I think one reason why the conflict should have been resolved earlier is so that Veronica's infamous style of doing things remains known to only a few people. If everyone in the team knew about her style, most likely they would also be against her and this might ultimately affect the morale and cohesiveness of the whole team.

    Another reason why we should have spoken to her earlier is that sometimes I think we are guilty of being at a stage where while we know what Veronica is doing wrong, we choose to keep quiet. Worse still, we find support from people who feel likewise about her before collectively gossiping about her. In a way, this is unfair towards Veronica because she might not know her flaws in the first place. Thus, it is also our job to be gracious enough to inform Veronica that she should be more aware of her actions.

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    1. hello xi min do pardon me for the late reply!

      Yes I do agree that we do hesitate in voicing out our opinions when it comes to situations that are somewhat temporary like an orientation camp. Many of the OGLs do hold their emotions in as they knew they would no longer be collaborating with Veronica after the end of this orientation hence they did not want to end it on an ugly note. I guess gossips may be our only outlet to vent our frustrations though I do agree it is unfair to Veronica. Although it may be somewhat awkward, speaking to Veronica may have been the best solution so as not to snowball into a conflict.

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  5. Pamela, Thanks for this interesting post, sharing what seems to be a true-life experience. Such a drama! Generally, it's clear. However, like Caster, there are parts that elude me. For example, are the OGL also students? Are the short-term hires? Were they given common instructions? Also, for those of us who don't know, what was the "Amazing Race"? What was the mission at Vivo City?

    Of course, some of these details may not be important to the conflict. I'm just not sure.

    Ultimately, too, I don't see a question, per the assignment, raised for the reader to answer. What are we supposed to provide a solution to? Do you see what I mean?

    Of course, in any case, the drama between Veronica and the other OGLs stands out. But I feel like I need more information about the requirements of the OGL position and the nature of the people who do that to really know what to suggest. And suggest what to whom?

    There are a few minor language problems here:

    1) There were a mutual division ... >>> There was a mutual division ... (why?)

    2) She lashed out her anger at the other OGLs ... >>> She lashed out at the other OGLs ...

    3) If Betty and the other OGLs had voiced out their opinions... >>> If Betty and the other OGLs had voiced their opinions ...

    But the language is not a problem, for the most part, Pamela. And you have generated some good feedback. I appreciate the effort!

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    1. Hello Mr. Brad! Do pardon me for the late reply!

      I guess my post hasn't been very concise as there are a lot of technicalities of orientation that I did not include and hence the confusion. I'll take note of my language and grammar before posting!

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